I’m certain that Microsoft employes many clever, intelligent, and creative people. If so, why can’t they use some of that brain power when it comes to naming things?

For example, your main account folder in Windows is called the User Profile. Huh? In Unix, it’s known as the home folder, or $HOME, or ~ or just plain old home. Isn’t that a lot easier to understand than User Profile?

Writing about that User Profile folder in Windows is frustrating for an author. The name is awkward, non-descriptive, and not even accurate. Worse, Microsoft adopted the My folder prefix in Windows 95 and then abandoned with Windows Vista.

The User Profile name isn’t the worst example. For that, you have to turn back the clock to the early 1990s when PC memory management was all the rage.

There were two terms used to describe extra memory in a PC: extended memory and expanded memory. Both were different types of memory that a user could have and manage. Both terms differ by only two letters. Confusing? You bet!

For the record, extended memory is what we have today in our PCs, which we just call by the sane term “memory.” Expanded memory was a memory swapping system used to give primitive DOS programs more memory while still maintaining the system’s weirdo architecture.

How about Explorer and Internet Explorer? Which is which?

Explorer is the name of the program that displays folders on the desktop. It’s official name is Windows Explorer. Then you have Internet Explorer, which is the Web browser. My guess is that the confusing names came from the fact that Microsoft utterly and wholly believed that a web browser was an integral part of the computer’s operating system. So the naming decision was probably made by lawyers — and I shudder at that thought.

The networking window in Windows 95 was the Network Neighborhood. It then became My Network Places in Windows XP and finally just Network in Windows Vista. That’s nothing, however, because there are three network control icons in the Control Panel: Network Connections/Network Sharing Center icons, System icon, and the Device Manager icon.

In Windows Vista, backing up happens in two confusing places: The Backup Status and Configuration window as well as the Backup and Restore Center icon in the Control Panel? Which is which? Who knows! I always open the wrong one. Why Microsoft chose to have two separate, frustrating places for the same task simply underscores poor decision-making at the company, i.e., when you try to please everyone you end up pleasing no one.

In Microsoft Word there are three features that help you automate your typing: AutoCorrect, AutoComplete, and AutoText. Having written about Word for over 16 years now, I can tell you that I don’t know the difference off the top of my head. To be honest, they’re all basically one single feature with three confusing names. For bonus points, try to find the dialog boxes that control those features. It’s just not that obvious.