Whew. We dodged one this time!

Sometime today (July 7), scientists in Europe will be turning on the Large Hadron Collider, a humongous ring of magnets buried beneath France and Switzerland. The magnets will help accelerate two beams of 7 TeV protons, whirling in opposite directions. Then the particles collide and . . .

Well, some say that the world will end. In his book, Earth, scientist and writer David Brin predicted that mankind would produce a new energy source using black holes for power. Upon creating the first one, however, the black hole slipped out of the lab and began orbiting the Earth’s core. Nasty stuff. Could that happen when they turn on the Hadron Collider?

Well, obviously if you’re reading this and your weight isn’t fluctuating by several hundred pounds every few seconds, then mankind did not create a black hole.

But what about other nasty stuff?

There have been articles written postulating that various terrible things can happen when mankind starts to hammer the Creator’s pocket watch. Scientists reassure us that the Hadron Collider will not be making any particles not already made in our universe. (Which, I suppose, means that the thing is purely “organic.”) But keep in mind these are the same Scientists whose gainful employment, not to mention insatiable curiosity, is being fueled by the Hadron Collider.

My guess is that the world won’t blow up or that Death Beams™ will shoot out of Switzerland and decapitate Italy. But I can also promise you this: any new discoveries made by using the Hadron Collider will no doubt raise more questions than find answers.

Update 7/8. Scientists didn’t fire the Large Hadron Collider as planned. That’s why you survived. They delayed the initial firing for 30 days. You have a month reprieve.